tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2016505486794178553.post8021652757743159047..comments2023-11-03T09:37:18.738-04:00Comments on Deana Barnhart: Rd 1 Agent Pitch Contest #28 - EVERDREAMDeanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17958057331230037880noreply@blogger.comBlogger7125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2016505486794178553.post-27512967258610332282012-09-19T11:14:27.362-04:002012-09-19T11:14:27.362-04:00YOU HAVE MY VOTE!YOU HAVE MY VOTE!Babynoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2016505486794178553.post-90751614019934611952012-09-18T21:11:54.658-04:002012-09-18T21:11:54.658-04:00All done reading entries! Violet's comment pre...All done reading entries! Violet's comment pretty much sums up my feelings about this entry. I cannot get this beautiful, dreadful carnival out of my head.<br /><br />YOU HAVE MY VOTE!SugarMagnolianoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2016505486794178553.post-54855222270729318672012-09-18T21:03:10.450-04:002012-09-18T21:03:10.450-04:00This story sounds fantastic! There is so much enga...This story sounds fantastic! There is so much engaging material and the query is perfectly written. Awesome job!Jessiehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13946774095540289320noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2016505486794178553.post-84039750059805935172012-09-18T18:56:45.173-04:002012-09-18T18:56:45.173-04:00This entry had me at "pirate poet," and ...This entry had me at "pirate poet," and it only got better from there. Best luck!Alaskan Ninjahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15302796847867918294noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2016505486794178553.post-3828949823015428592012-09-18T12:28:46.522-04:002012-09-18T12:28:46.522-04:00Wow. Just WOW! This is SO not my usual cup of tea,...Wow. Just WOW! This is SO not my usual cup of tea, but OMGAWSH, I LOVE this! <br /><br />This is such a high concept premise, but you do a great job of breaking it down and keeping the plot clear in the query. Also, I love the way you infused a little world building into it ;-)<br /><br />And your opening!! THAT sealed the deal for me. Your prose are beee-uuuu-ti-ful!! You really have a talent for breathing life into your words. Well done!<br /><br />YOU HAVE MY VOTE!Violetnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2016505486794178553.post-42386988496108722252012-09-18T00:49:59.667-04:002012-09-18T00:49:59.667-04:00(Hi again! I plan to give out comments during this...(Hi again! I plan to give out comments during this round, and then I'll give out my top ten votes as soon as I have critiqued everyone's queries.)<br /><br />What a great concept! I love the idea of dreams as black market commodities, and your creativity shines so brightly in this query. This seems like such an original idea, and I can tell you've had a lot of fun creating this story. <br /><br />The first sentence of your 150 words is perfect. I also love your use of sensory details with the "metallic" taste of thunder.<br /><br />Just a note on your query. I'm not sure the "..." serves you well in your first sentence. I also wonder if you could kick that sentence up just a notch to make it even more show-stopping.<br /><br />Such a minor detail in an otherwise fantastic query. Excellent job!SugarMagnolianoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2016505486794178553.post-73179572939698523882012-09-17T12:14:07.902-04:002012-09-17T12:14:07.902-04:00Thanks for participating! My plan is to read throu...Thanks for participating! My plan is to read through all the entries and then begin my comments and critiques. I will give out my top ten my votes when I'm finished.<br /><br />Best of luck to you, and stay tuned!SugarMagnolianoreply@blogger.com